Book guide: Why is the brother afraid?
What are you afraid of?
And why are we afraid?
Why is the brother afraid? are emotional detective stories that cleverly investigate fears. An exciting and funny picture book that is a good opening for talking about fears.
Questions about fears
Alvdis wonders if the brother is afraid of thunder. Hamsa finds it exciting when it rumbles. Is there anything that you find exciting? How does it feel when something is exciting?
The brother may have lost his mothers, suggests Hamsa. Have you ever lost someone? How did it feel? What could be scary about losing someone, do you think?
Alvdis usually holds hands when she is scared, for example when she got an injection. Is there anything you can do to make you feel less afraid?
One day Kim pushed Hamsa, and Alvdis said "Stop!" Hamsa was glad that someone helped him. Has anyone ever pushed you? Have you pushed someone? How did it feel?
Hamsa asks if Alvdis wants a hug. She says yes! How do we know if someone wants to? Can we see it on the person? How can we do if we are unsure if someone wants or not, do you think?
Questions about play and spookiness
Hamsa and Alvdis ride the slide outside in the yard. What do you usually do outside in the yard? What do you and your friends play at preschool?
The brother rides a hot air balloon! What do you think might be exciting about it? Is there an activity you would love to do, but feel a little scary?
About feelings
The guy sitting on a rock and being scared shows an image of a person who is rarely allowed to show emotions in books and other media. By mirroring a young guy in this way, the male role can be broadened to include several different emotional expressions.
Getting the right to feel and express their feelings is an important part of becoming a whole person - both little girls and little boys need help to identify and put words to different feelings in order to take care of them in a good way.
About friendship
Alvdis and Hamsa play together, while sharing thoughts and feelings with each other. Showing an obvious friendship between girls and boys is important as it is often remade and interpreted as romantic love based on the heteronorm. Calling love romantic can drive friends apart because hearing things like "you're in love" becomes hard. Two boys playing together are rarely told that they are in love or that they will get married when they grow up. By instead always naming all relationships between children primarily as friendly, we adults can leave the children freer to develop their friendships and also the love patterns that suit them. Children's books need more images of obvious and strong friendship between girls and boys. Why is the brother afraid? is important because we need more role models who portray natural and strong friendships between boys and girls.
