We had a chat with the lecturer and author Peter Rung. It became a personal conversation about parenting, showing concern for others even outside one's own room, and pointing in the direction we want by talking about desirable behaviors instead of shortcomings.

Peter lives on Gotland with his partner Nina and two children. While we're talking, he's taking a walk through the woods with his dog. Sometimes the coverage is broken, but the conversation still feels close and genuine, almost like talking to a friend. The words flow out of him when he talks about his work with violence prevention, about the publishing house Rebel books that he runs together with Nina, and about the greatness of becoming a parent.

- A central thing in my identity is that I am a father. It was not a foregone conclusion that I would have children, on the contrary. But then everything changed when my partner became pregnant with Bonnie five years ago. Suddenly, other people's needs became more important than mine, and something happened to me as a human being.

Peter tells us that, even before he had children, he informed about equal parenting, but that he has become even clearer in his beliefs since he became a father himself.

- Those who repeatedly fail usually come from some form of trauma, have experienced violence in the home, mental illness, addiction and risk taking. Equal parenting and committed fathers present is an important violence prevention factor, that is my conviction, says Peter.

About Huskurage and daring to make it uncomfortable

Peter's mission is a more caring world and society, and that is how the idea Huskurage emerged: a violence prevention method to prevent, prevent and stop men's violence against women and violence against relatives. The method means that knowledge about violence and civil courage is spread in order to get more people to act when there is concern that someone will get hurt.

- House courage is about helping neighbors when you hear or see something. In homes with violence, the risk of children themselves using violence and being overrepresented in problem-creating behaviour, absenteeism and criminality also increases. Domestic violence affects the classroom, hallway, locker room, etc. I want to make people dare to step in, show care, consideration and consideration in all rooms regardless of room.

The good reasons are often about community and gaining status

Peter is often out lecturing to both children, young people and adults. And he emphasizes the importance of talking about desirable behaviors, rather than talking about the shortcomings.

- People get curious when we talk about what we long for. It is part of the solution, instead of part of the problem. Understanding the roots of resistance, and the reasons for maintaining a structure that is not favorable to everyone, is another important part.

Whether I'm lecturing to 60 chiefs in the fire department or a bunch of teenage boys in a sports club, it's not that different. The good reasons are usually about community, making people laugh, gaining status and being included. Therefore, we need to be careful when we condemn macho culture and ask the question: what are the good reasons? And what can we do instead?

We have to make demands on the rooms that have the biggest impact - like sports, for example. How come they don't work more with preventive behaviors? What happens in the room can do violence to others even if it is not visible. Care, concern and consideration would have great effects if we all make that change.

Decisive events that had a major impact

When I ask Peter how he got into this career, he tells me about some defining events that have influenced and inspired him. Among other things, the incident in Utöja, which made him feel that he had to do something. His own experiences in the changing room and sports environment and coming into contact with Non violent communication have also inspired him to want to change.

- And the film Patch Adams - based on a true story, it made me feel an abysmal longing for what I should do. After the film the tears flowed and I called My big day and asked what I could contribute, hospital clown or whatever. That led to me volunteering for them for five years.

And meeting Nina, being in her space and drive, gave me the last push in the right direction. Finding a partner who wants the same thing!

Peter's tip: dig where you stand!

Finally, I ask Peter to give his best tips for creating change in everyday life. And the answer is simple.

- Start with yourself, start with those closest to you and dig where you stand. Why? Yes, because we can save lives. The very fact that you step forward, your smile or your words can have big consequences just like the silence.

Thanks Peter! Everyone should be able to share your lectures and wonderful energy. Everyone should have someone like you in their space! Follow @peter_rung on instagram ❤️